Today was our Bitch-sensei’s birthday.

Since she always takes care of us, we were thinking there had to be some way we could celebrate her.

And so, I’d been dragged outside with Nagisa and the others to pick a present.

“A present, huh… Bitch-sensei has probably received most presents already…”

“Right? This is way too hard.”

“The class donation total is 5,107 yen. With this, a present suitable for an adult woman is…”

“Hey, can I talk to you for a second?”

The one who called out to us while we were struggling to choose a present was the young florist who’d called the ambulance the other day.

“Was the old woman’s leg injury okay?”

“Ah, the florist who called the ambulance then. Thank you for that time. After that, we managed to get her to forgive us…”

“I see. Good, I’m glad it didn’t turn into something serious. Also, I overheard you talking about wanting to give a present and something suitable for an adult.”

“Ah, yes. But we’re seriously stuck right now…”

“Then how about something like this?”

Saying that, the young man handed Yukiko a red rose.

The meaning of a red rose, if I remember right…

Affection.

Passion.

Fervent love, things like that…

“We live in an age where you can pick any present you want, right? So why do you think bouquets still work at the very front line even now? It’s not just ‘the heart’ behind it. Color, shape, scent and even how fleeting they are, all of that fits perfectly into human instinct.”

“That actually makes a lot of sense!”

“Right? Since it’s a flower connection, I’ll make it cheaper if you buy it. So what’ll it be?”

Our answer had already been decided.

After safely choosing a present, we headed for the staff room to put on the finishing touches.

Around now, Bitch-sensei was probably surrounded by classmates and wildly popular…

“A bouquet for Irina on her birthday? Why me? Wouldn’t she be happier if you gave it to her yourselves?”

This guy really doesn’t notice anything at all.

I can easily imagine how much trouble Bitch-sensei goes through.

“Karasuma-sensei. If you think that bitch is necessary combat power, then winning over a coworker’s heart is also part of the job, isn’t it? And of course, keep it a secret that we prepared the bouquet♪”

“You have a point. Alright, I’ll give it to her. Thank you for the thoughtfulness.”

After finishing the final prep, we contacted our classmates and had them guide Bitch-sensei back to the staff room.

We waited and waited for Bitch-sensei to return, hiding where we couldn’t be seen.

The door opened.

And in walked the star of the show.

“Hey, Karasuma! Listen to this! Those brats—‘Perfect timing.’”

“Irina, happy birthday.”

“…No way, you’re giving it to me?”

“Sorry I’m late. I’ve been busy with a lot of things.”

“Oh my god, I’m so happy. For you, this is surprisingly good! You’re not plotting something, are you♪”

“My desire to celebrate is genuine. It’s probably the first and last birthday celebration, too.”

“…What. What do you mean first and last?”

“Obviously. Either we finish the mission or the Earth ends… One of the two. Either way, it all ends after just half a year.”

At Karasuma-sensei’s words, Bitch-sensei’s complexion got worse and worse.

And then she started closing in on us more and more.

“Ahh, crap. We got found out?”

“I figured it’d be something like this. There’s no way that stiff would think of giving flowers for a birthday.”

BANG!

“Nyuhh!”

Bitch-sensei fired a handgun upward and Korosensei fell down from the roof.

This guy really is everywhere, privacy doesn’t even exist.

“Was that fun? Watching a professional assassin get toyed with and carried away?”

“That’s not true, Irina-sensei. The students did it out of pure goodwill to—”

“It’s not convincing, Takoratchi!”

“Hmph, I remember now. You and I are only in a business partnership. Nothing more and nothing less. Thanks to you, I’ve woken up. Thank you for the best present.”

Saying that, Bitch-sensei shoved the bouquet back at Karasuma-sensei and left the staff room.

“Karasuma-sensei! Wasn’t that kind of cold!?”

“Are you seriously still not noticing?”

“Do I look that dull to you?”

“...”

“It can’t be helped if you think I’m heartless, but… If she’s going to keep losing her cool like that, I’ll hire another assassin. A blade that goes dull over romance has no right to work here. That’s all there is to it…”

Karasuma-sensei was right.

Maybe it really was time for her to go…

After that, Bitch-sensei stopped coming to school.

* * *

“Three days now…”

“Did we do something unnecessary?”

“If there’s any movement from Irina-sensei, please call me. I have to go all the way to Brazil to watch soccer! Now then, samba!”

“Is Bitch-sensei okay? We can’t even reach her…”

“There are no signs of her appearing on GPS or public surveillance cameras…”

Like Ritsu said, if she isn’t showing up on surveillance cameras either, that’s a little unnatural…

“No way she’s just saying bye-bye over this…”

“That won’t happen. There’s still something I need her to do.”

“Right!? When she’s around, it’s fun, even if she says stuff!”

“Yes. Between you and her, a strong bond has formed. I’ve already confirmed that through a background investigation. I’m simply going to make use of it.”

It made sense the classmates were shocked.

That florist, that man, had blended into the class far too naturally.

Even I didn’t notice for an instant…

“I am an assassin known as the Shinigami. From now on, I’d like to give you a lesson!”

Faced with an obviously abnormal situation, everyone fell silent, mouths shut.

And the first to speak in that silence was that man.

“Flowers, through their beauty, erase human wariness and open the heart. Nagisa-kun, just like I told you. But the real reason flowers evolved to be beautiful and fragrant is… to lure insects. Ritsu-san, forward the image I sent so everyone can see it.”

As soon as everyone looked at the image Ritsu sent, there on it was Bitch-sensei, restrained.

“I’ll be brief. If you want to protect her life, don’t tell your teachers and come, all of you, to the place I specify. Of course, if you don’t want to come, you don’t have to. In that case, I’ll deliver her to you. Divided up so it reaches everyone… And the next flower will be one of you.”

“Ohhh, I’ve been listening quietly, big bro. We don’t even have any obligation to save her, you know, that stuck-up bitch. Did you not consider that you’d get beaten to a pulp here by us?”

“Incorrect, Terasaka-kun. All of that is wrong. You like her more than you think you do. And humans cannot reap the Shinigami. Fear not… The Shinigami will… reap people.”

With that, the man vanished from in front of us.

As if no one had been there from the start…

Leaving behind only a single map.

“Have the entire class come to the location on the map by 18:00 tonight… huh.”

“Same as with Takaoka. The goal is to use us as hostages to lure out Korosensei.”

“Damn it!”

“Should we use it…”

What Terasaka showed us as he said that was the special P.E. uniforms that had been issued by Karasuma-sensei the other day.

“Use it to protect… right.”

“I don’t care if you’re some ‘greatest assassin’ or whatever. Like hell I’ll let you go exactly as planned that easily!”

Looks like the class’s will has solidified.

We decided to head to the specified location to reclaim Bitch-sensei.

But I had something I needed to do first…

* * *

A little before we all went to the specified location, I decided to set up insurance just in case and emailed Karasuma-sensei to call him to the back mountain.

“What is it, Ayanokōji?”

“After school today, an assassin calling himself Shinigami approached us. He says he also kidnapped Bitch-sensei.”

“What?! Then what are his demands?”

“For all of us students to go to a specified location without telling anyone. Nine times out of ten, it’s a trap. He intends to take us hostage and lure out the target.”

“Then why did you tell me?”

“We don’t have time to prepare enough to counter his plan. I judged we needed a collaborator.”

“Go on.”

“First, we’ll go in after school, as demanded, with only students. That’s already decided. If he senses anyone other than us, sees any sign or presence, he’ll kill her without hesitation and disappear. If that happens, the students won’t recover from guilt and we’ll never have another chance to assassinate him. Of course I plan to resist too, but this time the opponent’s hand is too strong. If we lose whether we pick heads or tails, then we have to win somewhere else. If one hour passes after we infiltrate and you still haven’t gotten any contact from me, I want you to track my GPS and come rescue us. If it’s you and Korosensei as opponents, you won’t lose unless something extreme happens. And if we’re taken hostage, the chance of Bitch-sensei being killed becomes extremely low. Because right nearby there’ll be more useful student ‘tools’ lying around than her.”

“If I prioritized the target’s assassination success over your lives, what would you do?”

“Honestly, I have no move for that… Like I said, this time the opponent’s hand is too strong. To keep doing assassination in this classroom like we have, there are too many checkmate points. I’ll keep choosing what I think is the best plan… but if the result is what you just said, then that’s my loss for being pushed that far. So decide before the time comes. Which will you take, the lives of our twenty-eight, or the life of the Earth…”

“…Understood. And one more question. You said earlier, if there isn’t something extreme, you and the target together won’t lose. What is that ‘something extreme’?”

“If you and the target get split up. As you can guess, it’s nearly impossible for a human to compete with him head-on and assassinate him. If you join in, there’s almost no element of losing. But if you get split up, it’s different. The one they’ll trap is, of course, the target. There’s no point otherwise. And if you get split up, it’s basically checkmate. It becomes that worst case you mentioned. Even if you choose our lives, next time she could die, so that’s also basically checkmate.”

“I see. So to prevent that, you’re saying disable Shinigami before we’re split.”

“Exactly. And there’s one concern I have. It’s the possibility that Bitch-sensei wasn’t kidnapped and is cooperating by her own will.”

“That’s taking it too far, isn’t it?”

“Given her attitude before disappearing, cooperating to get results is more than plausible. The assumption that ‘it can’t happen’ will get your legs swept when it matters. When you face the two of them, keep your eyes on her movements.”

“…Understood.”